We have discussed how to find a fuckbuddy and how to keep a fuck buddy in a previous article. Yet I feel compelled to lay down some rules that will ensure you become the best fuck buddy a person can ever wish for. To have fuck buddies will always mean friends (or barely friends, acquaintances or just two people) that have sex together, just SEX. Sound easy… right? Well, it should be, but in honor of trying to keep this practice safe and fun, there are some rules to follow:
- No Cuddling. It can confuse people… you cuddle people you love and whom you have an emotional connection.. don’t start with all the touchy warm and fuzzy body contact
- Making out is NOT obligatory. Making out is a glorious thing… but it is not necessary when it comes to fucking buddies. It depends.. so uses your discretion
- Never ask questions afterward. Unless it is to say, thanks for fucking.. do not engage in dumb conversations like “what do you think of me?” “what do you feel for me?” None of that is cool
- After the F*cking there is no need to stay over. After sex, it is ok to get your stuff together and part ways.. your purpose finishes after climax.. once you are done GET OUT!
- It’s just a physical thing. Always remember that… do not mix things up… Sex is sex…
- It should always be FUN. If it is not, then get a new fuck buddy… it’s that simple… the one you have isn’t good enough!
- Don’t expect anything else than SEX. The only thing a fuck buddy owes you is SEX.. if you find yourself expecting anything more, then you screwed up… and you need to figure out what HE/SHE is to you
- No phone calls or text messages the next day. Unless you want some more
- No jealousy allowed. There is no reason to be jealous.. nothing to be jealous about.. if your sexual needs are not met, find another fuck buddy!
- Don’t get personal. Don’t start talking about your personal life and your problems. These people are here just for sex, and starting to talk about daily drama is gonna simply kill the mood.. and you do not want that. Do you?
- When it is time to meet be respectful. Be well-groomed, well bathed, and well shaved. Hygiene laziness will simply make your partner lose interest.
- It is NOT a relationship. You are simply getting together to get something done… it’s like a simple agreement that requires the participation of 2 people (or more).. if it comes to an end, then let it be…
- They are not friends. Do not count on them… they are there just for sex…
- No need to lie when you want to hook up. If you are horny, simply let them know… call them/text them and say “I am horny, and I would like you to come over and screw my brains out”.. Enough with the lame excuses:” I’m drunk”, “I know you are home alone, and I am also home alone” and the most awful random text “What are you doing” at 3AM…when clearly at 3 AM I am doing NOTHING!
- You can have more than on Fuck Buddy. It goes back to jealousy, why be jealous? You both can have multiple fuck buddies and that’s just great! It’s two mature individuals making the decisions to fulfill each other sexually whenever they feel like it… and the more you have the better the choice…
- If it gets weird, break it off. If one in the fuck buddy relationship starts to show affection or act weird.. decide whether you want to move in a different direction or call it off completely. Do it early, don’t wait around…
- Always play safe. Might sound stupid.. but I don’t care about much you trust the person… always use any possibly mean of protection.. avoid pregnancies and embarrassing STDs
- No public interaction. If you see the other person in public make nothing of it.. remember, it is just sex…
- Keep it private. Don’t be a dick… keep the name of your fuck buddy private! Don’t disclose the names with anyone.. that is NOT cool…
- Get Dirty! The last most important rule is to be dirty, be fun, be kinky! There is no need to hold back… experiment. Sex is all you have, exploit it!